My Day-To-Day Photos

 I was lying in bed, having just started up the diffuser, when I heard a crackling sound. I jumped out of bed to see if something was wrong it. Nothing. Go back to bed, hear it again. There's something familiar about that particular crackle. Ahh, Georgie is in the basket. Then Todd came up and he informed me that both kitties were in the basket. 

 We had a great time in Edmonton! We shopped at a huge flea market.  I found an antique corkscrew, a CD -Janice Joplin and a walrus beanie baby for KK.  We went for Sushi, we were all a little disappointed with the food, but we still had The Tattoo and Art Exhibition.  It was cool. Being the opposite of cool, (uninteresting) I didn't fit in there at all. I like tattoos, but there are few that I love. There were a lot of people getting tattoos, a little too much skin in a few places. I felt like I was intruding on an intimate scene. I did pick up a little skull candle and KK and I bought prints from one of the tattoo artists. It was different,  challenging, and quite inspirational.  The way people were expressing themselves so openly was an assault on my emotions.  I felt like crying and bursting out laughing at the same time.  The drive, 18 hours round trip, went well. The first day was very easy, passed quickly and comfortably.  The way home...

 Just after 3 pm and we're making excellent time on our trip to Edmonton.  I can't believe bow fast this drive is going. Maybe it's because I drove to Saskatoon after stopping by the farm. We're taking all sorts of goodies to KK. Grandma went out of her way and made both borscht and corshy. Our kiddo is going to be overwhelmed with gratitude.  It feels so good when someone does something special just for you.

Having rested the day before, and medicating the day of, I did manage to enjoy myself for the tradional Easter brunch. The day after, I had a great day. I ate well, went for two walks and even did some house cleaning.  But, for the past two days, I've beencondemned to my bed again and is it worrying me only because we're to travel to Edmonton day after tomorrow.  I'm hoping that the change of activities and scenery will lift my mood enough so as to not feel these symptoms as strongly. I am wondering how much of these symptoms are due to the withdrawals and how much, if any, is due to the MDD.  I suppose, with time, I will at least get a partial answer. For now, I rest as I feel I need to regardless of the reason for the needed rest.     

This past winter has been the longest of my life. It's halfway through April after a big snowstorm and temperatures are hovering around zero.  After having a few days out of bed, I thought that was the end of bedrest, but here I am again. I want to enjoy Easter at the farm, so I'm resting as much as possible today. Unfortunately, Brenda and Stephen both have Covid and KK won't be home, so it's going to be a small gathering of Ostapovitches. It's likely to feel a litte solemn.  

 On December 11th, 2021, we lost our Bear. It's hard to believe that 5 months has passed already. There is still way too much space in our house without him. Eventually, we will adopt another dog to help fill that void in our life. My husband and I are nearly empty-nesters, and the house is too quiet. Going for a walk seems pointless without our best friend. I can take walks with my husband but walking by myself is still unbearable. I'm at the point in my grieving where I no longer forget that he's gone. Thinking of him brings on an overwhelming wave of grief, but it's not quite as bad as it was, and I can even, once in awhile, remember him and smile. Having lost several animals during my life, I know I'm on the right path in my grieving process, and that eventually all that will be left is the wonderful memories.

 One of the excellent things about being in my bed all day is that I get to enjoy the company of my cats.  When they do things like snuggle each other, it melts my heart. My health is finally, noticeably getting better. I've noticed a major decrease in the 'brain zaps." I'm able to eat more now and my nausea is taking a backseat. It's still there, but I'm managing.  Today I spent my entire morning out of bed and even went out for breakfast. The food at Humpty's is always tasty, but their furnace was out, so we ate our meal in 10 degrees in our parkas.  There's been a lot of bad news this week.  Actually, all of the news came in yesterday. Cousin Tom Ostapovitch  passed away. Then Jared told us that both Sophie's Grandfather and Father passed away within a week of each other. "Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you think everything is ok." - Alanis Morissette  Anything goes. Death does not discriminate, doesn't sort out whe...

 The wee sheep Jared gave to me on my birthday has become my constant companion.  I like stuffing him under my chin when I'm falling asleep. And, I admit, I play with him sometimes.  I've made him dance to music. I would do that with Soots, but it's kind of cruel, and we never want to stress out our kitties.

Confined to my bed for the majority of the past week, I have become quite irritated. I feel good while in bed, but as soon as I get up and try to to do things, I get sick. Dizziness and nausea plague me. The good things are, I haven't worn pants or a bra in days and I'm getting in endless snuggling time with the cats. Todd had brought me a couple of Riesen candies up for dessert, and I used one of the wrappers to make an origami butterfly. Bored. But it has to be done.