Time

 It is a cold, foggy day. Not at all a good harvesting day. But, the landscape is still beautiful. 

I'm at Starbucks this morning, licking my wounds from the not distant enough past. I would rather isolate, hide away in my basement and not risk being vulnerable in public. Hopefully I don't start crying. That would be embarrassing. But back to my topic, time. I find myself wishing for more, and wishing it would pass more quickly. I want to put Jared back in grade 10, so I could enjoy his high school years from a healthier place. I can barely stand the fact that this is his last year of school.  On the other hand, I wish I were several more years into my future where I am a healthy, well adjusted person again. That future can not come quickly enough, and I am drawing on patience I do not have. I have a feeling this winter is going to be a long, arduous one. But, my intentions are to apply myself to therapy and immerse myself in healing.